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The simple amusements of life
The fuchsia bra’s so tight, Wendy Fiore’s got shade.
Remember: you can’t spell “patriotic” without “erotica.” Uh, except for the e.
Just a movie about a diamond in the ruff.
the-pun-isher: FLIPSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The picture says it all
ecmajor: graynine: wild—pup: they’re going to the yiff war Movement on land will now be measured in knots as well
tastefullyoffensive:(photo via bierrr) What are you gonna do when the bacon strips????? :3c
Welcome back to the shopping channel, what we have here is a broken Rolex watch! A timeless piece. Buy it now for just ű.95
thisspinsterlife: godlegos: strangeasanjles: mamashug: ttfkagb: In the accompanying article Dwayne Johnson talks about his struggles with depression. damn he look good omg that chicken pox scar on his cheekbone *passes out* uh can we focus on
I always wondered about the population of radioactive big cats, until i bought a tiger-counter!
m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: watch them find a way to use this to complain about how terrible millenials are I SWEAR TO GOD ban old people from the internet they are literally saying that politicians who make life easier for people other than them are
emir-dynamite: sharkchunks: iandsharman: notahoe: my type of public transportation “Why were you late in today?” “Oh, I got tied up on the subway…” I was always 50/50 on whether to reblog this but the last comment pushed it to like 95/5
ambulanceartist: Our paramedic carried a guy who had six small plastic horses shoved up his ass for unknown reasons. The hospital listed his condition as “stable.” We died.
tayisoutofthewoods:officialannakendrick:iguanamouth:this mug i bought has a cat sitting at the bottomgoodbye kittyI’M SO MAD
samael: khatoblepas: There they are, the two genders. only a cis deals in absolutes
Steppin' around in the desert of joy
the-punning-ubus: catchymemes: Conditional Immortality of Lobsters so its either being eaten by humans in the end or being eaten by bacteria in a suit to tight for them in the end honestly i cant decide which is worse
rihannoyed: what’s the cheapest meat in the market? deerballs. they’re under a buck.
daily-superheroes: A batman joke for the “masses”http://daily-superheroes.tumblr.com/
The Best of Tumblr
THE GOD x TERROR ERRA SQUAD
lesbianlove07:Relationship goals This is me >.<
sister-sons: Hobbit Valentine’s cards part 1 (Because I had a majestic need for lame hobbit puns okay. Pt. 2 tomorrow!)
guemoza: OH MY GOSH this is so late but I FINISHED ON TIME. Day two of Thorin’s Company Valentines! Here’s Fili, barreling you down with love oh ho ho ho puns. Click here for the other Valentines!
strawberryjizzbomb: fake-suicide-of-genius: theyearoftherequiem: frenums: skeleton smartypants was defeated once and for all THE REACTION FACES JUST MAKE THIS 84927 TIMES FUNNIER This is my kind of humor
The Music Of The Universe Plays
adamhathaway:wednesdayxaddams:adamhathaway:I’ve been making dad jokes for years but my wife and I are expecting our first child and I’ve finally been making dad jokes while actually being a dad. When we were in the hospital I got my wife a blanket.
rum:tennis players yell so loud when they hit. like what’s with all the racquet?
donut-give-a-fuck-about-abs:For the non Australian’s out there, Coles is a supermarket chain and this is bloody hilarious.
fadetoblk: It’s a bat pun.
the-anal-destiny: Needless to say, he blocked me Wait… how do you get Great Balls?
mouseketia: say someone has a dog named lucky and lucky runs away in the middle of the night wouldn’t that mean that the owners would have to be up all night to get lucky
notoffended: davidstrider: davidstrider: which american president was least guilty lincoln he was in a cent I told this joke at Mouth Rushmore and the park ranger hit me
worship-the-emenator-because-she: sluttytobias: sluttytobias: what did earth say to the other planets? wow. you guys have no life. oh my god
unsuccessfulmetalbenders: lordoftheinternet: THE LEANING TOWER OF PISA IS IN ITALY IT’S ITALICIZED *adds to list of things that i never even would have bothered to think about if it werent for this website*
shslspookyscary: adropofred: comment s’appelle un chien qui vend des médicaments? un pharmachien why the fuck is this joke in french and why there is 26k notes am i missing something important
spooky2pope: karkats-left-eyeball: spooky2pope: what do you call a drunk basketball player a slaM DRUNK you know what fuck you i was gonna say tequille o’neal but no you had to blow my punchline out of the water i cant even win a fucking coin flip
questbread: if Finland’s country border isn’t called the Finnish line then I have nothing to live for
jerkidiot: do british prostitutes charge by the pound
dirkkawaii: phlynn: whats the plural of dubstep dubsteps or dubstairs If you fall down dubstairs would that be a bass drop
communistbakery: astronomers got tired after watching the moon go around the earth for 24 hours so they decided to call it a day
dutchster: worldpeaces: can we just take a second to realize that there are 14 year olds that weren’t born in the 90’s. just fucking let that sink in. what the fuck does he want now
sluttyoliveoil: sluttyoliveoil: what does the teen boy say after murdering a man haha no homo(cide)
ivegottobethere: ima-ho-ho-ho: rneerkat: snapfox: rneerkat: rneerkat: what happens to nitrogen when the sun rises it becomes daytrogen I’m going to bed. good nitrogen sleep tightrogen don’t let the bed bugs bitrogen
wonla: madman-in-a-blue-box-at-221b: ernbarassing: “Is it push or pull” I panic to myself as the doors come closer panic! at the doorway well at least someone closed the goddamn door
willsicott: tuxedoandex: ugly: What do you call the security guards outside Samsung shops? what Guardians of the Galaxy
geizler: homiemura: a baguette in the butt would be a pain in the ass i’m unlearning french
darling-highness: redgrieve: fluttertree42: why do people have quiet respectful funerals when i die i want my ashes mixed with glitter and packed tightly into a coffin and then they blow up the coffin with explosives so glitter rains down on the guests
chamomilegeode:did you know that, besides the apple of knowledge and the pomegranate of life, there’s another mystic fruit, one that grants you a sense of purpose? yeah, it’s the raisin d’être
the-absolute-best-posts: craigward14: be the leaf I can’t stop looking at this I can’t beleaf this
unpresentable: the-beauty-in-breakdown: unpresentable: doughnuthunter: unpresentable: I’m good at math. U + I = 69 Wait that would mean that I = 59 because U sure are a 10 oh No. U + I = 145 as the atomic number for Uranium is 92 and the atomic
havexheart: cory-doctorow: did you bury your dog to make a shitty pun But look how stoked the dog is
the-frostiest-of-butts: I just can’t how bad the puns on this site are getting
the-many-fandoms: I finally understand the pun
olivialaurel: My dad and I were in a hotel and he tried the coffee and smiled and said “ahh, it’s like making love in a canoe.” and I said, “it’s that good?” and he stopped smiling and looked me in the eye and said, “no, it’s fucking
discount-supervillain: You know that’s actually my secret origin. Not a lot of people know this, but I was actually just a pun grown out of control. My father was understanding without laughing, and my mother was the death of modern comedy. also
The only thing I’m slightly upset about is the fact that no one noticed my ‘ Beatrice/BEAT-rice’ pun on Harley’s mallet ;A;
Korra is the Wan who Raava to Unalaq the spirit portal
