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If I wasn’t already drunk on Thursday night, LOL, I would not be doing this butt… this is me in the shower, like it or not. And no, that’s not a guy’s cum on my bum bum - it’s soap. or is out? Lol thanks everyone for all
alexmayo: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THIS HAPPENED TO ME!!! on valentines day :P
Me trying to figure out how to relay hyper specific information I know and am excited to share about a thing I like that got brought up in casual conversation in a calm and controlled way so I don’t come off as an overbearing weirdo
What the hell did I just read? Haha I think he’s angry because my bio says I’m not looking for older guys. Not my fault that what I’m attracted to happens to be young/twinkish military guys
Lord give me the strength to not let this guy (that I went on 2 dates with) get the best of me
Is it an Aries thing to realize I’m not into someone but still stick around & then be pissed if they turn me down? Cause that’s my whole past love life lol
faineemae: that-grey-eyed-girl: faineemae: oh it’s 11/12/13 it’s not the 11th December.. excuse me
spencerofspace: I went to bed bath & beyond last week and there were these cups that you could pick up but not push over and they made me so mad
adr0itness: the-bearded-knight: platonicknifelust: that’s not a fucking cat WTF This fucked me up
skyfirephoenix:nineteencallme: straight people Yes, I would’ve done that if I didn’t have a panic attack in the middle of a mall This is EXACTLY how gays work right guys? <:3c Better yet, come
newerleaf: queerfemmedomme: why do “daddy doms” always write their about me like “welcome to my own private corner of the internet where all my most private and depraved fantasies will be explored. You’re not ready for the sick playground that
wolfwars: theholleywoodsigns: dankmemesreasonforliving: Explains why I’m so fucking stupid no, not like ‘stupid’ brain damage. your emotions become so stressful your brain starts getting a little numb to them. you start experiencing higher
Not that anyone following me doesn’t already know this but can we PLEASE put an end to saying things like “I’m just so ADD today” or “blame it on my OCD lol”When I say those things, I’m eitherA) making a little
Donghae says that members call him "event guy" because he does many events for his girlfriend. He said "I do many events... but when I'm not doing them, I guess I might be a little cold... That's why I do many events... And members call me "Event Guy"
damianmcgintleman:why the fuck do people always remind you that taco bell isn’t real mexican food like do you not think that i know that like do you think i go to taco bell because i think the 16 year old white guy behind the window just made me authentic
Not even worried that this makes complete sense to me.
tunabatter: knifeandlighter: tunabatter banana peel? will that work? I’d feel less like a wuss buying bananas than aloe. my masculinity is preventing me from buying aloe. but if the burns really bad, make sure to disenfect it once it calms down
fffcuk: subternatural: fffcuk: if you’re a girl!!! download the app pink pad!!!!! it’s fabulous or if you’re a guy that likes pink… i’m not going to rant all about gender roles, but this discourages me the pink pad app monitors your ovulation
I’m gettin a happy trail. 😳 24 and just now getting hair on my chest lol pathetic. I was depressed last night. Stepped on the scale. Weighed 200. That’s down 15 lbs in 3 weeks. My diet has been horrible. So busy with work and not getting
aa-noms-you: pursuingthemeaning: do not fall in love with people like me. i will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth.
cunning dom.
Girls that suck dick without being asked are goddesses and should not be fucked with.
gogglechild: spaceace8: idjtits: spaceace8: idjtits: idjtits: idjtits: are pears flammable after 2 hours of trying to set alight to a pear i can condclude they are not flammable mum: whats that smellme: burning pearsmum: wha-me: i tried to set
chicken-grease-peace-nipples: lepetitebourgeoisie: paper-thin-rainbow: slacktory: ryanhatesthis: Well, that’s enough internet for me today. I will never not love how beautifully this spirals into madness. *Gets up from seat and leaves* its been
owlmylove: bibliotheksbewohnerin: things that still freak me out: those sinks americans have in their kitchens that you can destroy stuff with DO OTHER PEOPLE NOT HAVE GARBAGE DISPOSALS
tom-sits-like-a-whore: manlayingegg: vvankinq: When my balls stick to the inside of my leg… im not even a guy but this is funny the fact that this is a thing that happens is making me crack up
qeworudjsnkmcxa: sherlockedwithloki: mischiefmanagedin221b: please tell me i’m not the only one that went “butt-butt-butt-astronaut” at first no you’re not because i went “shit-shit-shit-poodle” 😂😂
xbeautifulcontradictionx: thissbrowngrl: blacksnobbery: nourrice: reallyreli: I’ve been laughing for 16 mins now. This is how you take control of your relationship. ME From 0-100.. Nah, 0-10000 Lmao this is me af. “Kneel down in that space
calvin-klein-sign-me-already: iampinkkai: ablacknation: suprchnk:thighetician:suprchnk:skater4life95: kidxforever:Just off slaveryAfrican americans should be able to go to college for free tbh Fuck that. No one deserves anything they don’t earn
iashvee: tarynel: lebritanyarmor: babyfacecinema: uniquelyme92: shannonchristal: caliphorniaqueen: letmeprosper: babyfacecinema: eastcomptonclover: babyfacecinema: Love how he playing the creepy guy but not over doing it . I hate Michael Ealy
tarynel: Tumblr has shown me a lot of wild shit. I thought I was a freaky bitch until yall hoes said yall would eat food that ya man bussed a nut on. That’s when I knew I was not a freaky ass bitch. They got a skeeted-on-food side of tumblr now? Wild.
chocolatecakesandthickmilkshakes: “Yo, you want some of these ribs, they hot off the grill?” “Hell nawh, I do not fuck with no pork, but you pour me some of that Patron and pass me one of the Black & Milds tho.” “Huh!!??” “Never mind.”
afrodomonative: resistdreasoning: gadaboutgreen: tormans-space: 40datruth: brosephmcphearson: mightymorphinlightskin: WHOS AUNTIE bruh in the back aint take his eyes of that thang for not half a second boy i tell you h’waht Lmfaooooo And didn’t
bhatteshwari: lperezidente: ufos-looking-for-me: Drunk Girls Get Surprised With Puppies This is so lovely, got me smiling like an idiot I am so happy that they are happy “I should not drink whisky I CANNOT PROTECT THEM”
jacking-off-in-the-library: deadlyflashesofgreen: flacarica: unfaggy: sheslikeliquor: me its rare that Britney can get away with shading someones live vocals LMNATYUIMJIJM9 Owch I’m the guy in the back cringing
atasteoflee: wy-uh: tatted-black-widow: chrysalisamidst: fuckrashida: Happy Black History month Which left omg I bet that’s not even mom! They’re fuckin with us LIESSSS I believe it They triplets. Nothing can convince me otherwise.
awkwardassbitch: judgejudyofficial: In French we don’t say “Marry me,” we say ted cruz est le tueur du zodiaque which roughly translates to “Let us never separate” and I think that’s truly beautiful I’m not gonna ruin this but I just
msixela: maintencemanmemories: msixela: fuckinecstasy: 760mastermind: Divine ayo ma, im tryna fuck I’ll pass my pussy isn’t made for fuck niggas that think they can fuck virtually but do keep trying just not with me And the award for best
tashabilities: veryfemmeandantifascist: iamchinyere: Prince was like “No ma'am, that check did not clear, I am not here for this singalong” Forever the king of shade The MASTER of Fuck You, PAY ME.
The Golden Age
lady-chyna: pixielifts: africanyounot: So my little sister just burst into my room, grabbed me and whispered “omg the reason Patrick is so clueless is because he lives under a rock” I… To be honest did not get that until now omg
freekicks: i love watching the olympics. i know nothing about these sports but by hour 4 i’m like, “poor dismount. look at those knees. not enough elevation or rotation on that last move. clear 3/10 points deduction. tsk.”
chase-me-lead-me: yungtoothpic: lexluna24: diekingdomcome: bishopmyles: withloveloveroxy: energyh7: theryanproject: disazter16: cosmic-noir: LMAOOOO STOP 😂 That last one tho The fucking theme song is what kills me 😂 I’m sooo deadddddd
moosefeels: riza-hotguy: octoberspirit: schazam: i-think-im-so-funny: This is so true it’s not even funny. winryapplepie kittenarmor no one believes that middle america is super weird until they see pics and it cracks me up every time.
nosympathyforwhites: illestfrisco: taint3edcakes: Men irritate me everything to y'all is just “It’s not that serious chill why you mad?” But y'all get mad just at a post that says men in it. It could say “men eat cereal” and y'all gonna blow
agendershittyknight: agendershittyknight: agendershittyknight: agendershittyknight: not to toot my own horn but im an okay person sometimes not to brag but some people like me and tell me i am their friend not to be that guy but i can adequately
karayray1: virgoassbitch: This meme traumatized me Bruhhhh Ok this is wrong on 100 levels but this shit hilarious 😂😂😂
billieholibae: Asked this one nigga to slap me one time when we were fuckin and he hit me with the light tap tap and I had to reiterate like I need you to slap me. He was like nah I’m not trying to hurt you and I’m like nigga that’s the point.
jaeswavy: Me everyday. All seasons. That’s me except I refuse to eat in bed, I’m too sloppy and sleeping on crumbs is not the wave.
Ok somebody gotta help me out here…is that just for show or is it functional? If it’s for show, is it detachable? Can you get a different sized one? Did somebody really ask for this?If it’s functional, was there really a need for a
jamaicanamazon: gluten-free-pussy: digable-planets: mbtimemes: got to be a honorary bee keeper for a day! one of the bees even landed on me and did a lil happy dance! we gon act like this bee not twerkin or That bee throwin that ass in a circle
beachdeath: taylor swift invites me to her Reputation Secret Session listening party. i know that this means taylor’s read my blog, and she must know i’m not super happy with this album cycle. so i’m on my best behaviour, trying hard to be nice
Nigga not my house, ain’t no stranger gonna have me holed up in my own shit. Now that one lady on the block that be talking forever? Her ass have me under my couch lmao
New friendsSo last night I went to a play party that my roommate and his girlfriend talked me into. Definitely not what I expected. I somehow magically ended up teaching boys how to flog their girlfriends lol. Pretty fun. But did notice one woman who
Hi everyone!So, not sure if anyone noticed but my posts and reblogs over the last few months have become a teeny bit more…dark lol. And I decided fuck it, it’s my blog and I actually want more things that I think are hot to me. With that
Yeah…..reminds me of when i get pissed of at sir and cross my arms like this while yelling at him. Doesn’t work coz he stops listening to me at that point. His blood ain’t going to the right head anymore…. :-/ lol
liryae: There is literally nothing in nature that blooms all year long, so do not expect yourself to do so. i get the point, but perennials can grow continuously throughout the year and some maintain foliage all year
stardustschild: Me to my anxiety : can u like calm down these people don’t even think about youDepression : ever Me: that’s not what I meant
Yeehaa!!! Its that time of the night when things like this seems like a good idea…
“oh my gosh blake, not like that!”(MS Paint is a fun challenge lololsgfg)
